Rock bottom is a reflection of Fear

A few days ago, I shared about Rock Bottom.

It's the moment you know your marriage is falling apart, and something needs to be addressed. Tolerating disconnection and loneliness is no longer acceptable.

It's the loss of a child and the grief that it brings. 

It's the loss of a job, bankruptcy, or waking up each day knowing you can't keep going like this. 

It is the grief, the despair, the heartache, the dissatisfaction. The doubt, the shame, the depth of loss and brokenness. 

Where to now?

I believe the greatest gift of Rock Bottom is finally stepping into radical self-responsibility, and the only way up, the only way through, is with Truth and Love.

For the truth shall set you free... and Love is what liberates. 

When my marriage fell apart, I had to confront that I was the common denominator in all my relationships. Me. I had to look at my behaviours and take ownership of my part in breaking down all my relationships.

My lack of trust. Me holding back. I couldn't be vulnerable. I was always the alpha. I continuously reminded them of how much I didn't need them. I kept everyone at arm's length. I would attract and stay with the ones that would feed my "I don't need you" and "I'm unlovable story".... and I would push away anyone that would feel safe and loved me. 

There was NO chance any relationship could work. 

That truth set me free. 

I behaved based on an "identity" and view of the world that a younger version of me made up. 

I recognised that my behaviour was based on how the world occurred. My interpretation of it all. 

We ALWAYS act in alignment with who we are for ourselves. 

I was in Fear. And I acted in alignment to Fear. The results in my life weren't a mystery. 

I was at Rock Bottom because I was SO afraid to be me.......and I lived this fabricated life based on Fear. 

When I knew this, I could see it so clearly.

So how did I get out of Rock Bottom? I deliberately and intentionally lived my life, "one choice at a time".

I purposely paused and observed how I spoke; I would observe my actions - and I was my own Science project. I would ask; "What would Love do?", "What would Fear do?", "What would be loving to me?", "Does this action have me love my life more or less?"

Each choice would either be an expression of Love or a reinforce my addiction to Fear.

I knew that no-one was going to come save me... even if they wanted.

The only way up, and the only way through - was to live consciously - one choice at a time where each choice was an intentional expression of Love.

The day I realised I was the common denominator in all my relationships, in all the events and circumstances in my life, and finally took ownership of it all, I made myself a promise.

NEVER let your Heart harden again. 

When we let our Heart harden, we live from Fear. We make choices from Fear... and that's how it led me to Rock Bottom.

Since that day, a few days shy of turning 29 - I have a daily (I repeat DAILY) commitment to keep my Heart open, to cultivate this Heart connection, and to live from my Heart. I rarely make a choice from Fear, and if I do, the course correction and refactoring period is really short. 

In a few weeks, I'm turning 42. That's 13 years of dedicated practice and mastery of cultivating and living from the Heart.

That commitment to Mastery, and the process I take my clients through, is why my clients call me "the last piece of the puzzle".... and how they finally get to "embody" decades and decades of inner work.

Because it's easy to be great when things are going great.
And it really takes extraordinary to be great, when your world seems to be falling apart. 

The life you want, the experience of Freedom and being at ease with life, can't come from a place where your choices and actions reflect Fear. 

Shifting your identity from Fear to Love - that's the greatest gift you can give yourself and the greatest legacy you can leave your children. 

It changes everything. It changes your relationships and your receptivity to possibilities. LOVE is the key to abundance! ;) If you're in scarcity - you're in Fear. 

If you struggle with trusting yourself, it's because your choices and actions are in alignment with Fear.

If you struggle with feeling safe in relationships, the same thing. You have an identity that has behaviours embedded in Fear.

Great news - You created the identity; you can also unlearn the identity and create a new one. 

So... all you need to do is focus on "one choice at a time" and have that choice be an expression of Love.

And soon, you'll discern between when you are in Fear vs when you are in Love.

Sending love,
Yummii xx